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Sunday, September 13, 2009

Who I See


Depending on the size of your town, your job or your daily life, each of us sees a different number of people on various days. We see our husbands or our children, people passing in cars or on the sidewalk, people in cubical or behind the cash register, people pumping gas or sitting on a bench. And it always amazes me that as we pass these people everyday, few of us say hi, some of us don't look the other in the face and some of us (even though we are in an amazing relationship) only see our friends or our family in the contexts that we want to see them in.

I'm not here to say that I am any different than many people. There are days when I will say hello to everyone I see. Then there are others when I will look at the ground as I pass someone so they won't see my face. Then there are other days when my kids and life consume so much of me that I just don't understand that there are other worlds going on around me. There are many days when I am so inside my own head and heart, that I can look at other people's faces, but I don't want to see their faces. I've found that the more I look into my own issues, the harder it is to look out.

I have been thinking a lot about the people that we come into contact with everyday. So, this morning I went downtown to see who I could see and who I could meet. I saw a man sleeping on a chair outside of a coffee shop with several groups of happy coffee drinkers around him, laughing and enjoying each other. I saw two homeless men walking into that coffee shop with their long beards and toothless smiles.

Then I saw a young woman sitting on the corner. As I went over to introduce myself, she explained that she believed she had missed her bus and needed to get to work. So, I drove her to the Dollar Tree, learning that she had 11 siblings and that everyone of them had "Ty" in their name. Tyanna, Tyrone, Tyrice...she was 20 years old with a one year old daughter and another one on the way. I explained to her our project here and my ideas for hosting this week; she didn't feel like she looked good enough to have her picture taken this morning, but appreciated the ride. And I was happy to help her.

I went back downtown because I thought that the man that was sleeping just might need some breakfast or coffee, so I was going to buy him some and leave it next to him until he woke up. But on my way down the block, a large man, stopped and waved at me, asking me if I wanted to go to church with him as he hugged me like we were old friends. I told him that we had homework to do, but I could buy him a cup of coffee and chat with him for a while. He needed to get to church, so he declined, but I offered to buy him some food to take with him. This man was interested in hearing stories about my kids and told me that he was 53 years old and only had children as Abraham had children in God's eyes. He called me button as we talked...and of course, wanted to know if I was married. He wanted to tell me his story, so I learned that he grew up in a wealthy family in Chicago, but had joined the military and was wounded by a gun. He had a scar on his arm. He explained the medications that he took for his mental illness to me, told me that he was still waiting on his disability benefits and a large sum of money from his aunt. This man with some grey hair lit up when he told me that he wanted to go back to school to be a singer then was teary eyed when he told me that he rarely had food, and that finding a place to sleep was often difficult. I asked if there was some way I could help him; that we don't have a lot, but I could bring him food once or twice a week. He just looked at me and said that he just needed some money to tithe at church and get through the day. And so, I obliged. As we walked to the ATM, I learned that he worked for Edward Kennedy, the FFA and had gotten several FBI and Chicago politicians arrested for busting drug dealers and reselling the drugs to kids.

As I took out the money, he asked me if I could tell his story in the paper. I told him that I just have this blog. And he wanted me to tell you all that he told the judge all he wanted was this: that everyone has love, peace, joy, mercy, hope and forgiveness. He asked if that was too much. And I told him that that was the best wish that he could possibly have. He took me by the hands and said a prayer for me and then we hugged and he went on his way.

Here's the thing: I know that this is a tall tale, but this was probably the best 15 minutes of his day. He was so happy to have someone to talk to, to share his story with, someone who saw him waving and who would hug him. He let me take his picture, but closed his mouth because he had four or five missing teeth. But he really had a beautiful smile!

This week, I'm not asking you to hunt down homeless people or to stop strangers along the way. We all have different stories and circumstances. We all have different emotions. There are people in your own lives that I'm sure you need to slow down and really see.

I am, though, asking you to step outside your comfort zone. It is easy to take a picture of a flower because she can't stop you and say, "Oh, no, I'm missing a petal today!" But to take a picture of a person, you have to have a story that goes along with it. So, who is it that you see this week?

19 comments:

  1. excellent challenge Dani. I will definitely take you up on this.

    you are such a beautiful person - inside and out.

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  2. Great idea and really great story, it touched me. Thank you for sharing it.

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  3. Dani, this really touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes. What a lift you must have gotten from interacting with this man, and obviously your interest and caring made his day. Blessings to you.

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  4. oh what fun and a sweet story to go along with it!

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  5. Oh, you've thrown down a good one for us this week! I'm looking forward to exploring the topic.
    :-)
    Great photo -- great story.

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  6. wow! i love stories like this and am constantly conversing with strangers, just to hear their stories ;) thank you so much for sharing this one!

    love + luck + bliss
    missysue xox

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  7. what a great story dani...and what a great challenge....I can't wait to see "who I see this week"....as now I'm so inspired !

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  8. Wow...this is beyond words....A true challenge!
    I love the fact that you are not "shy" about approaching people and talking to them...me however, this will be new, especially with camera in tow! Thanks for sharing this story!

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  9. Beautiful, beautiful story Dani.

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  10. Wonderful story - great portrait - and great challenge! I'm looking forward to it!

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  11. I am so impressed with your ability to approach strangers and make contact...the story and the photo that resulted are wonderful.

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  12. This was incredible - thank you. And yes, this is waaaaay out of my comfort zone. I always say hello to people I see on my walk, but I've never been comfortable enough behind my camera to ask for a picture. Quite frankly, because I hate taking pictures of myself, so I would certainly declined if someone asked me... but we'll see how it goes...

    :-)

    love,
    me

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  13. Doing some so simple like yo did really made a difference to this mans day.

    I'm up for the challenge to show you who I see this week.

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  14. That is so beautiful Dani. This story has made my day. x

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  15. Stepping out of my comfort zone is always hard for me. I love how you stepped up to your own challenge.

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  16. oh wow....how inspiring is this!? Incredible....just incredible.

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